15+ Good Personal Statement Examples for Students,Learn how to write your college essay
WebApr 19, · Personal Statement Example for College A personal statement is a key part of your college application, increasing your college admission chances. It is WebFeb 16, · Here’s an example (note the values in bold): Upon reflection, I found that my answer didn’t exist in books or research, but somewhere very close from the WebFirst, he loves to participate. Despite his insistence that he cannot dance, we see him dancing throughout his essay. Second, he realizes that he can in fact dance, but needs ... read more
I have learned the basic foundations of supply chain management through courses such as operations management, strategic purchasing, and inventory management. I have also taken mathematics and statistics to help me understand data problems. In addition to my academic interests, I have a full and interesting life off-campus. Those times spent on the court have strengthened my team spirit and my ability to work under pressure. During summer vacations, I spend time travelling around Europe and the United States. My first experience in Amsterdam was unforgettable, and it made me consider coming back in the future. Planning the trip carefully, and living alone in an unfamiliar area, have turned me into a more independent young woman.
Professionally, I have done internships in international companies such as Red Bull and ASUS. These experiences gave me the chance to work in a global context with people from different countries, which has encouraged me to have a more flexible and adaptive mindset. Because of these wonderful experiences, I am certain I will conquer all future challenges and make the most out of them. I am confident I excel in this programme due to my solid educational foundation in business and personality strengths. The applicant clearly lays out her educational and professional background as well as her skills. She also includes two solid paragraphs about why she has chosen her program of study and later explains why she is both qualified and a perfect fit.
This essay displays excellent organization and has a natural flow of ideas indicative of a native English speaker who can write exceptionally well. This college applicant came with a very strong academic and professional background. A solid handle on supply chain management not the most exciting major with internships to back it up. She is able to connect things like her academic math experience with personal motivation. First, she shows that she is a well-rounded person , not just a student that studies for grades. Second, she conveys her well-developed personal identity that has chosen this course of study at this particular college in this particular country. Make sure your college essay communicates this! Every major university has a business school, and every business school has a supply chain management program.
This applicant clearly explains how she personally wants to attend this particular university in The Netherlands. She lists her personal travel experience and mentions a specific mentorship program. I am passionate about computers because technology will continue to play a fundamental role in our lives. Based on this fact, I researched colleges that have both a strong computer science program and co-op program, and this is when I found Hofstra. I visited the campus for a tour and was really impressed with what I saw.
Not only are the campus facilities top-notch, but the advanced computer science labs are world-class. I asked my tour guide about the class sizes and curriculum style. I was thrilled when he told me that average class sizes are in the 20s and that the curriculum emphasizes experiential learning. I am looking for more than just academic excellence; extracurricular activities, including community service opportunities, are also very important to me. In researching schools that would provide students with the most well-rounded lifestyles, I was amazed to see the number of philanthropic events that the school hosts and supports. Students are also welcome to start new clubs if no existing clubs can foster their interests. The energy on campus is something that I noticed right away. Leaving home to attend college is a big change for everyone, and I think school pride and a strong sense of community will help me make a smooth transition.
I was very happy to hear that students get two tickets to events on campus. This is especially great because I am a sports fan and would love to experience the electric game-day atmosphere of a division one basketball game and cheer on the Lions! I do not want to attend college in a big city, but the fact that New York City is so close opens up a lot of opportunities. First off, there are numerous internships at top companies in the city. In addition, it would be great to visit the city from time to time and see a show or sports game. Being able to do that with friends would give me great experiences and memories. Hofstra is my top choice because it fulfills my most important criteria: esteemed faculty members, a strong computer science program, a strong sense of belonging, amazing internship and community service opportunities, and a diverse campus.
I cannot wait to be a Hofstra Lion! This essay is words, which is perfectly under the word limit on many college admissions essays. Although content is the main focus, your personal statement needs to abide by all rules laid out in the essay brief. That includes mundane but essential stipulations such as word count. Excitement is something that every student tries to portray in their admissions essay, so be sure you emulate something like this. The challenge with this is making sure that the essay is still about the applicant, not just the important person. Elizabeth does a great job of incorporating that important person, her grandmother, while still keeping the focus on herself, what she learned from that specific moment, how that impacted her life. Stella begins this essay by discussing her experience learning to fly.
This anecdote, however, is less about the act itself as it is what the experience taught her in regards to perspective and points of view. First, he loves to participate. Despite his insistence that he cannot dance, we see him dancing throughout his essay. While crosswords with my grandma illuminated the two-way nature of teaching and learning, this experience enriched my understanding of exchange with patience. Although it would be faster to explain the steps, I practice patience and engage them in an exchange. This way, they arrive at an answer on their own, allowing them to ingrain the new information in their memory. Mentoring robotics has solidified my notion that teaching is an exchange, and that patience is an integral part of that exchange.
But most significantly, I understand that the dynamic pair of teaching and learning must come hand in hand for it to be effective. And the only way to have this kind of relationship is by helping each other solve our respective crossword puzzles. Insight —There are several moments that show the author has worked on the ability to reflect. Craft —The author has clearly spent several drafts revising and thinking through their choices. The clarity of phrasing and sentence structure demonstrate that this author is ready to write in college. Upon graduation, I will be able to analyze medieval Spanish poems using literary terms and cultural context, describe the electronegativity trends on the periodic table, and identify when to use logarithmic differentiation to simplify a derivative problem.
Despite knowing how to execute these very particular tasks, I currently fail to understand how to change a tire, how to do my taxes efficiently, or how to obtain a good insurance policy. A factory-model school system that has been left essentially unchanged for nearly a century has been the driving force in my educational development. I have been conditioned to complete tasks quickly, efficiently, and with an advanced understanding. I measured my self-worth as my ability to outdo my peers academically, thinking my scores were the only aspect that defined me; and they were. I was getting everything right. Then, I ran for Student Government and failed. How could that be? I was statistically a smart kid with a good head on my shoulders, right? Surely someone had to have made a mistake. Little did I know, this was my first exposure to meaning beyond numbers.
I had the epiphany that oh wait, maybe it was my fault that I had never prioritized communication skills, or open-mindedness qualities my fellow candidates possessed. Maybe it was me. That must be why I always had to be the one to approach people during my volunteer hours at the public library to offer help--no one ever asked me for it. I resolved to alter my mindset, taking a new approach to the way I lived. From now on I would emphasize qualitative experiences over quantitative skills. I had never been more uncomfortable. I forced myself to learn to be vulnerable by asking questions even if I was terrified of being wrong. My proficiency in using data evidence could not teach me how to communicate with young children at church, nor could my test scores show me how to be more open to criticism.
The key to all of these skills, I was to discover, happened to be learning from those around me. The process of achieving this new mindset came through the cultivation of relationships. I became fascinated by the new perspectives each person in my life could offer if I really took the time to connect. Not only did I improve my listening skills, but I began to consider the big-picture consequences my engagements could have. People interpret situations differently due to their own cultural contexts, so I had to learn to pay more attention to detail to understand every point of view. I took on the state of what I like to call collaborative independence, and to my delight, I was elected to StuGo after my third year of trying. Not long ago, I would have fallen apart at the presence of any uncertainty.
As I further accept and advance new life skills, the more I realize how much remains uncertain in the world. Hopefully, my wings continue enabling me to fly, but it is going to take more than just me and my wings; I have to continue putting my faith in the air around me. Values —Again, we get a bunch of core values threaded throughout the essay: intellectual curiosity, perspective, growth, relationships…. Insight —There are several nice moments of reflection in here. Craft —The author does a nice job demonstrating their ability to write.
The hook is interesting and effective, and is bookended nicely at the end. Special thanks to Andy for contributing to this post. Andrew has worked as an educator, consultant, and curriculum writer for the past 15 years, and earned degrees from Stanford in Political Science and Drama. He feels most at home on mountain tops and in oceans. Our Story. Our Team. Contact Us. College Essay Coaching. College Admissions Counseling. Interview Prep. Graduate School Admissions. Matchlighters Scholars Program. College Admission Essentials. College Essay Essentials. Free Resources. College Admissions. Personal Statement.
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But before diving into analyzing some great personal statement examples, it helps to get some context on what a personal statement actually is, and what writers should plan to include when writing their own personal statement. What should a personal statement include? I Ethan have spent the last 15 years answering this question, which you can learn more about in my free 1-hour guide. In our opinion, a great personal statement example has 4 qualities. After reading the essay, you can identify whether your essay or topic show each of the four qualities by asking yourself the questions below:.
Do you detect a variety of values, or do the values repeat? Does it sound like the author wrote it using mostly his or her head intellect or his or her heart and gut? After reading the essay, do you know more about the author AND feel closer to him or her? Are these moments kind of predictable, or are they truly illuminating? Craft : Do the ideas in the essay connect in a way that is logical, but not too obvious aka boring? Can you tell that the essay represents a series of carefully considered choices and that the author spent a lot of time revising the essay over the course of several drafts? Want a more thorough guide on how to write a personal statement?
Day I am using my school uniform as a slate to tally the days. As the ink slowly seeps through the fabric of my shirt, I begin to understand that being a conscious Arab comes with a cost. Day 7: I come across a live stream on social media, 1, Palestinian political prisoners are on their seventh day of a hunger strike against the Israeli occupation. It is the first I have heard of its occurrence. I allow myself to follow the news daily through social media while regional mainstream media and our local news channels refrain from reporting any news of the strike. Day I am engulfed by the cry for justice.
Day No one else seems to know anything about what is going on. I am compelled to find a way to embody the struggle. In my first period class, I see a marker beside the whiteboard. It seems funny at first--they laugh, confused. But each time the marker touches the fabric it tells a story. It is a story of occupied countries, a story in which resisting apartheid becomes synonymous with criminality, a story we refuse to address because we have grown too apathetic to value life beyond our borders. As my classmates draw the tally, together we tell the story of the hunger strike and mourn the distance human beings have created between each other.
Day My uniform has become a subject of question. Each pair of eyes that fix their gaze on the ink, I share the story of our Palestinian compatriots. The initial responses are the same: disbelief, followed by productive conversation on our moral responsibility to educate ourselves on the conflict. Day Each day the strike continues, I have asked my classmates to draw another line on the tally. While it still comes across as unsettling, it seems to no longer represent the reality of the hunger strike. My classmates are no longer interested in what it means.
I am supposed to move on already. After being instructed to get a new shirt, I choose to challenge the order. As long as the hunger strike lasts, I will continue to voice the reality of the hundreds of prisoners, in hopes of recreating the sense of responsibility I originally sensed in my peers. Day A compromise deal is offered to the political prisoners and they suspend their hunger strike. I walk out of school with a clean uniform and feel whole again, but unnaturally so. I was left feeling an unspoken kind of weakness where I broke under the realisation that not all sorrows could resonate with people enough for me to expect them to lead movements. I would need to be the one to lead, to recreate the energy that the tally once inspired.
I decided to found a political streetwear brand, Silla, where fashion choices transcend superficial aesthetics by spreading a substantial message of equality and donating the profits to NGOs that advocate for social change. Through Silla, I am able to stay in touch with my generation, keeping them engaged with issues because of how they can now spend their money Silla has mobilized people to voice their opinions that align with equity and equality. Because of my adherence to justice, I was elected student government president and I use it as a platform to be vigilant in reminding my peers of their potential, inspiring them to take action and be outspoken about their beliefs. When the ink seeped through the fabric of my uniform it also stained my moral fibres, and will forever remind me that I am an agent of change.
Uncommon topic and uncommon connections. Overall, this is just a stand out piece. The unique story of how the author had lines drawn on her shirt pulls the reader in. Having an uncommon topic makes writing a strong essay a bit easier, but by itself is not enough for a great essay. The student does a great job evoking the emotional response of her peers and beautifully articulates her own indignation with the apathy that emerges. When you write your essay, consider how you can use uncommon connections to take your reader to places they may not have expected to go. Experimental structure. One of the many cool things about this essay is its structure, which demonstrates the quality of craft.
The author uses a montage structure that emphasizes numbers and chronology, two ideas that are central to the content of the piece itself. Remember, admissions officers read tons of personal statements; an uncommon structure can go a long way in setting you apart from the crowd. In it, she tells us about her politically-aware fashion line and her appointment as school president. As we make our way into the Haram, my heart shakes. It became the spiritual, visceral, and linguistic journey of a lifetime. In Makkah, I quickly learn shopkeepers rip off foreigners, so exchanges like this, where I only have to say a few Arabic words, make me appear local. It also connects me with real locals: the Saudi Arabian pharmacist who sells me cough syrup, the Egyptian grandmother seeking directions to the restroom, the Moroccan family who educates me on the Algerian conflict.
Day 6: The tents of Mina. Temperature blazing. Humidity high. I sleep next to an old woman who just embarked on her twentieth Hajj. Her ninety-year old energy--grounded, spiritual, and non-materialistic--inspires me. So far, every day has been a new discovery of my courage, spirit, and faith, and I see myself going on this journey many more times in my life. My new friend is curious where I, a Bengali, learned Urdu. I was delighted to discover the resonances: Qi-yaa-mah in Arabic becomes Qi-ya-mat in Urdu, Dh-a-lim becomes Zaa-lim… Urdu, which I had previously only understood academically, was the key to developing a personal connection with a generation different from mine.
When my parents want to speak privately, they speak our native tongue. My parents taught me to look out for myself from a young age, so Hajj is one of the only times we experienced something formative together. It also made me aware of how important shared traditions are. As I think back to those sweltering, eclectic days, the stories and spiritual connections linger. I came out of my American bubble and discovered I was someone to be looked up to. Having studied Islam my whole life, I knew the ins and outs of Hajj. This, along with my love for language, made me, the youngest, the sage of our group. Whether at the Al-Baik store in our camp or the Jamarat where Satan is stoned, people asked me about standards for wearing hijab or to read the Quran out loud.
I left the journey feeling fearless. The next time I go to Hajj, I want to speak two more languages: donc je peux parler à plus de gens and quiero escuchar más historias. Details about the specific resonance of Urdu words and the conversations this author shared with the people they met on their Hajj brings this essay to life. Nearly every line is full of vivid imagery and textured language. Those details make this piece fun to read and truly bring us into the world of the author. Uses images to convey a sense of time, place, and self. As a result, the author is able to talk about so many different aspects of their culture.
The way the details are conveyed also speaks to the aesthetic sensibilities of the author, providing another window into who they are as a person. Uses dialogue effectively. In this piece, however, the author does a great job of using their conversations with people they meet along their journey to convey their values and interests. Not only does the dialogue emphasize their fascination with language and cultural exchange, but it breaks up what would have been dense paragraphs into nice manageable chunks that are easier to read. In short, I skipped two grades: first and sixth. Between kindergarten and eighth grade, I attended five schools, including two different styles of homeschooling three years at a co-op and one in my kitchen. Before skipping, I was perennially bored. But when I began homeschooling, everything changed.
Free to move as fast as I wanted, I devoured tomes from Jefferson, Hamilton, and Madison to London, Kipling, and Twain. I wrote page papers on subjects from Ancient Sparta and military history to the founding of the United States and the resounding impact of slavery. I discovered more than I ever had, kindling a lifelong joy for learning. While high school offered welcome academic opportunities--studying two languages and taking early science APs chief among them--the social environment was a different beast. Many classmates considered me more a little brother than a true friend, and my age and laser focus on academics initially made me socially inept. Oftentimes, I secretly wished I was normal age. That secret desire manifested itself in different ways. I had grown up obsessively tracking my New England Patriots.
Now, instead of armchair quarterbacking, I poured hours into throwing mechanics and studying film after my homework each night. But in the rush to change, my attitude towards academics shifted; I came to regard learning as more a job than a joy. That view held sway until a conversation with my friend Alex, the fastest receiver on the team.
Essays That Worked,How to Write a Personal Statement - Example
WebFirst, he loves to participate. Despite his insistence that he cannot dance, we see him dancing throughout his essay. Second, he realizes that he can in fact dance, but needs WebApr 19, · Personal Statement Example for College A personal statement is a key part of your college application, increasing your college admission chances. It is WebFeb 16, · Here’s an example (note the values in bold): Upon reflection, I found that my answer didn’t exist in books or research, but somewhere very close from the ... read more
At six years old, I stood locked away in the restroom. And some of those aspects may feel fundamentally disconnected: Is it even possible, for example, to write a personal statement that includes your career goals following a step by step approach in a way that is still personal? For a more complete guide to using Narrative Structure to shape your personal statement, check out that link. School: University of Pennsylvania. I wanted to see new places and meet different people. I resolved to alter my mindset, taking a new approach to the way I lived.
In the middle of my junior year of high school, I received the tragic news that Mrs. It was awkward. I rushed to the restroom to throw up because my throat was itchy and I felt a weight on my chest, college essay personal statement examples. El abogado tuvo una idea: yo tenía sobresalientes calificaciones y cartas de recomendaciones. Since when has a sheet of loose leaf paper ever defeated a solid block of granite? Her reply shocked me.
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